The Playlist of a Journey

Music is a very big part of my life. I have found that it is one of the things in my life I would be lost without. Throughout the journey God has been taking me on, he has really spoken to me through different songs. At first the songs were ones that would bring comfort, but then they soon changed into songs that sing of His love.

In the next few posts I would like to share some of the songs that have really spoken to my heart and ministered to me. I have already written about two songs in previous blogs so I figured I should share some more.

The first song I would like to share is Desert Song by Hillsong.

This is my prayer in the desert
And all that's within me feels dry
This is my prayer in the hunger in me
My God is a God who provides

And this is my prayer in the fire
In weakness or trial or pain
There is a faith proved
Of more worth than gold
So refine me Lord through the flames

And I will bring praise
I will bring praise
No weapon forged against me shall remain
I will rejoice
I will declare
God is my victory and He is here

And this is my prayer in the battle
And triumph is still on it's way
I am a conqueror and co-heir with Christ
So firm on His promise I'll stand

All of my life
In every season
You are still God
I have a reason to sing
I have a reason to worship

This is my prayer in the harvest
When favor and providence flow
I know I'm filled to be emptied again
The seed I've received I will sow

I love this song because it shows the different stages we go through in our Christian life. We go through seasons that feel so dry and then God fills us up again and it is time for a harvest. In talking with a friend about this song, I shared how I loved the bridge because it says "All of my life, in every season you are still God and I have a reason to sing, I have a reason to worship." This line is so powerful, and I think it is so easily forgotten. No matter what we are walking through in life, God is still God. He still loves and cares for us.

I think it is so easy for Christians to forget to worship God in the seasons in our lives that feel like a desert. I believe that if we seek God out in those desert seasons, he meets us in ways that we could have never imagined! God blesses us for worshiping him in the good and the bad times in our lives. You just have to trust that everything is going to be okay because it is in God's hands.

I know how unbelievable hard it can be to give up control and put all of your trust in God, but it is the best thing that you could ever do. God continues to bless me everyday because he knows I have given him everything and trust him completely.

Remember that God is still God always. Psalm 45:11 says "because he is your Lord, worship Him"...

God hears me

One night last week I found myself laying in bed late at night talking with God. I was asking him for something that I have asked him for many times before and still have not gotten. As soon as I asked God the question I would then say, but I know you want me to be patient so I will. I went back and forth with the question and that statement a few times and the went to sleep.

The next day God gave me what I asked for. It was not in the form that I would have liked to have it in, but alas he still gave it to me. I kind of laughed about the situation later because I know God sure was when he gave it to me. I can just see him now with a smile on his face saying "You asked for it, so here it is...literally." I could have easily been made about the way God answered me but I wasn't. Instead I was happy to know that God heard me.

I don't think I have ever gotten an answer to my question as quickly as I did last week. God saw me pose the question, but then remind myself to be patient. I was content with being patient and God rewarded me for it. I know that God will answer my question in the way I truly mean it one day, but I'm not ready for yet.

I think I am getting better at this patience thing after all...

Loneliness vs. Solitude

As I was listening to one of my Relient K cds, there was a line in one of the songs that really stuck out, “loneliness and solitude are two things not to get confused.” So in hearing this line I thought I would look up the definition of the two words. According to the Oxford English Dictionary loneliness means “the quality or condition of being alone”. Solitude means “the state of being or living alone; loneliness, seclusion, solitariness (of persons).”

The two have very similar definitions, so what exactly did Relient K mean by saying not to confuse the two? Well the next line of the song is “…because I spend my solitude with You.” I believe that solitude is a voluntary action in which we spend time alone with our God.

God has most certainly been teaching me the importance of solitude. A year ago I would have told you I was an extroverted person, but now I’m not so sure that I am anymore. Spending time in solitude with God is so unbelievable amazing, and I would much rather spend my time in solitude with God. He is the only one who is always there with me, and listening to my every thought. I know that I am not spending my time feeling lonely because I am choosing to spend my time with God. I am never alone, and neither are you...

…The song that inspired this is called “Therapy”. I recommend you go and listen to it for yourself.

Be Still...

So it has been a while since my last post about patience. Well what I have learned the past two months is that learning patience is frustrating. I guess that is the point though. My life has also been extremely busy the past two months as well, which I think adds to my impatience. I have reached the half way point in the semester and work always keeps me busy. Between those two things I haven't really had a lot of time to set aside for God, which I really hate.

Even though I have been so busy, I still have things that are laying very heavy on my heart. Every time I pray about my worries in life I just seem to get more frustrated when God replies with "just be patient." AHHHHH!!! I get that I have to be patient, but I am not getting answers to my questions. That is the frustrating part of this lesson.

Patience is about learning to trust God when the answers don't come quickly. If only stating that made it easier, but it doesn't. Not getting the answers I seek is hard, but it also means that God isn't ready for me to have the answers yet. As I was reading Psalm 46 the other night, God pointed out a verse that I have read so many times. Verse 10 "Be still and know that I am God." Not only does God want me to have patience, but He also wants me to chill out and just focus on the fact that he is God.

So here I am, just trying to relax and focus on God's wonders. I'm going to take the time to stop what I am doing and focus on God. I'm going to turn off all of the distractions for a while and give that time to God. That is all He is asking from me right now, and I am going to give him that. When God gets the attention he so desires from me, He will show me the answers I am seeking...

The Patient Follower

Well I have spent the past five months learning how to trust in God. It has been a journey I have not always enjoyed but I'm at the point were I trust God with all of my being and I know He is in control. Learning to trust has been so amazing and I have grown so much in my walk with God, but the time has come for a new lesson...Patience.

I am such an impatient person. If you ask any of my friends they will tell you that I yell at stoplights when they take to long to change and when people drive too slow it kills me. When I'm hungry I will have the fastest thing I can make(or buy) because I don't feel like taking the time to make something healthy. This is not a very good trait that I possess, but I would like to fix it. The past few days my patience level has been pretty much non existent and it was in a moment of impatience that I realized what God was doing.

He has been telling me over and over again that His grace is enough for me, and I truly believe that it is. Yet because I know his grace is enough for me and he can fully sustain me, it is causing me to think that my journey is over. Gosh am I so wrong about that.

I am starting to realize that trust and patience go hand and hand. You can trust God all you want, but if you don't have enough patience to trust in what he says then you are going to make hasty decisions that may not end very well.

Abraham trusted God, but when God said he was going to be a father of nations, Abraham thought he had to take the situation into his own hands. If Abraham had just been a little more patient he would have prevented a lot of conflict that still occurs today. This is just an example from the Bible to back up my patience and trust theory (well I guess its not really a theory since it's true, but you see what I am saying).

I know that this next phase of my journey is not going to be easy at all, but when I make it through it I will be in such a better place. This lesson reminds me of something I heard in a sermon one time, "Sometimes we have to wait awhile for God to suddenly move." I know that if i just sit and wait in God, he is going to surprise with something amazing.

So for now I am going to be a patient follower of Christ, and listen for his voice to guide me and lead me down the path he has chosen for me.

The Great Love Story

I long to have a love story people will talk about for years to come. When people talk about it, they will always be envious of what I had. Now I am not talking about a love with another human being (even though I do hope for a great love story in that aspect). I am talking about a great love story with the Father.

Something that I have been learning lately is how complete we can be in God’s love. I have always sung the songs that talked about God being enough but they were never really true in my life till now. I was always looking for something more elsewhere and assuming that I had reached my contentment in God.

There are two things wrong with that mind set. One, you should only being looking for something more in God and not other things or people. There is always more when it comes to God. Two, I was so wrong in thinking I had reached contentment with God.

God’s love is so vast that we humans cannot even begin to scratch the surface of his love. I am discovering now how fully content I can be in loving God and God alone. I can truly say now that all of God is more than enough for me. Now I am not saying that I am content in where I am now and I’m just going to stay here. I believe that being content in God is realizing that he is all we need and then continuing to go after his heart in search for more.

My love story with God is going to be great because I am never going to stop chasing after his heart. I will be content every step of the way, and still ask for more. I want to be known as someone who is after God’s own heart, and I plan to be. I am made complete in him and I truly feel it. He is all I need in my life until he says otherwise.

The Mission/ Elevate

So this past week I got the opportunity to participate in our church's youth camp. I have been to camp before but this year was different. First of all I was not attending camp as a student but as a leader. Second, we spent the entire week doing community service projects during the day and services at night. The overall experience was unbelievable. God showed me so much and also challenged me.

Being a leader for the first time was not what I expected it to be. Now it was not a negative thing, but something far better then I could have imagined. I was pushed to step out of my comfort zone and be an example for my students. There were three students that I was in charge of all week, and the bond I made with each of them was God ordained. I know that God will continue to use me in their lives.

Even though I was there as a leader, God still meet with me and began to teach me another lesson. At the alter one night, Pastor Pat told the girls to ask God to dance with us. Now little did he know that I have constantly been asking God to send me someone that will dance with me, but God gave me something better...Himself. I heard God speak to me and what he said to me broke me, "I have been standing here waiting for you to let ME dance with you." I had to apologize to God for not letting him in. I was so concerned with finding something human to satisfy me that I forgot that God could satisfy me.

After this I felt such a refreshing spirit come over me. God's presence was so amazing and tangible that I did not want to move. I can't remember the last time I felt such peace, and that peace can only come from God. I have to remind myself that God is more than enough for me, and he has always been there waiting for me to let him in and to romance me.

Let God romance you and bring you closer to him...